Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
I'm drunk enough to know I'm texting you and sober enough to know what I'm saying to you
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
Randomize
