I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
Randomize