If i come over, it means nothing
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
Randomize
