Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
I just convinced a telemarketer I live in a tree.
What did he say?
He still asked if I want a home security system.
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize
