I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
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