chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
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