ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
Trouble in the neighborhood - turns out my brother's summer lawn care gig also entailed banging three different MILFs and they just all found out about each other
Gotta pay for college somehow...
Randomize