i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
You would seriously think I would remember who put themselves in my phone as Burt Rynalds Moustache, but I don't. And I need to be reminded of who you are so I can give you a proper high five.
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Randomize
