Betty ford says i'm here all night
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
Enjoy the penises
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
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