So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
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