I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
Randomize