If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
Randomize
