When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
nothing makes up for a small, perpetually flaccid penis quite like a British accent
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
Randomize
