I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
Randomize
