is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
Randomize
