We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize