hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
Randomize
