i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
Randomize