Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Randomize
