I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
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