It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
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