Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
You don't know the meaning of what the fuck until you wake up naked and alone in someone's bed staring at a dead squirrel on their dresser.
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
Randomize
