Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
The cops high fived after they tackled you
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
That awkward moment when you realize you've been secretly blackout dating someone for three months. Drunk me is in a committed relationship.
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Randomize
