ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
Every time I burp I plan an escape route because I'm scared I'm gonna puke on grandma
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
Randomize
