I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
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