i permit you to call me
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
My pussy is not your playground.
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
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