Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
I need moral support for this bender
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
I'm not going to waste the next hour of my life writing a diplomatic email explaining that she's bitch. I have Parks and Rec to watch.
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
Randomize