Redeem this text for a blowjob
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize
