My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
Randomize
