You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
new rule: cockblock me if I have had over a fifth of jack. no matter what.
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
