It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
Randomize
