I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
How can I explain how nice he is to you? ...like, I'm going to have to have my world famous why being a douche is sexy talk.
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
Randomize
