can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
Legitimately semi-blackout across the table from the governor off a chardonnay i can't even pronounce.
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
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