had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
What the hell happened to my hand?
Well, you got in a fight with a cabbie while jaywalking, but we got you to walk away. The problem was 80 blocks away, when you punched a parked taxi for "running you over".
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
Randomize
