I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
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