I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
i bought another $5 worth of vodka. with change. i look like a homeless alcoholic. i need your dino cups or else i'll be forced to make a giant jello bowl shot
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
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