"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
Randomize
