I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize
