Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize
