i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
Randomize