sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
you mean i was at the winter classic?
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
