so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
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