come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
did i just pee glitter
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
Randomize
