Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(212): View more from New York

that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me

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(402): View more from Nebraska

I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors

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(513): View more from Ohio

I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?

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(330): View more from Ohio

98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk

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Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Read it at the TFLN blog
(732): View more from New Jersey

I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.

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(217): View more from Illinois

And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.

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(770): View more from Georgia

Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.

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(409): View more from Texas

We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans

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(314): View more from Missouri

He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened

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