Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Randomize
