I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
I want her autograph on my taint
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Randomize
