ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
