It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
Randomize
