Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
My vibrator broke.
Dude it's been less than twelve hours. Did you sleep?
Don't worry about that. I need a new vibrator.
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