they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
You were trust falling into bushes
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
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